Common Traits of Longevity

What do the longest living people

in the world have in common?

They say that it is the little things that matter most in life.  That is true especially when talking about the secrets of longevity.  Apparently it is the small details of daily living that add up to a healthier and longer life.  That is what the people at National Geographic discovered when they tried to explore the secrets of longevity among various people and cultures.  While looking for the common traits in lifestyle among the longest living people on the planet, they discovered certain similar practices which could be considered a formula to living a longer life. 

There are areas of the planet where people tend to enjoy longevity.  People there reach the age of 100 at extraordinary rates and reach these ages enjoying   amazing health  and strong cognitive capabilities.  The places have been geographically and demographically defined as the Blue Zones.  Blue Zone places like Greece, Nicaragua and Japan can teach the rest of the planet how to live a long and healthy life.  In the book, “The Blue Zones: Lessons for Living Longer from the People Who’ve Lived the Longest”, Dan Buettner maps out some common traits shared be these groups of people.

Lifestyle of Food

Diet is key to longevity.  Those who live in the Blue Zones share the same foundation in their diets. They all get the bulk of their protein from beans rather than meat.  High consumption of proteins from animal products can increase mortality levels by 70% and greatly increase the risk of getting cancer.  The Blue Zone centenarians eat beans, grains, fresh fruits and vegetables on a daily basis and enjoy small amounts of meat only a couple times a month.  They also drink a little wine daily which brings high levels of polyphenols and antioxidants into their diets. They live much longer than average with just a fraction of the current rate of dementia in their elderly years.

Lifestyle of Motion

People who live to the age of 100 and older are engaged in physical activity throughout their lives.  They don’t actively take part in exercise like per se but their lifestyles are set up so they are constantly in motion either through walking, gardening or doing household chores, mostly without the aid of modern conveniences.  Their daily chores keep them fit because they do them the old fashioned way: walking to the stores instead of driving, kneading bread instead of buying it sliced and packaged, planting, watering and weeding a vegetable garden…. These daily tasks create unconscious physical activity which carried out over a lifetime leads to a fit and healthy body.

                                                                                         

Lifestyle of Purpose

Having a sense of meaning or purpose in your life can add up to 7 years to the average lifespan.  The people living in the Blue Zones focus on family and relationships.  They live with or near their adult aged children and help raise their grandchildren.  They are deeply involved in the daily lives of their family because they all live, work, eat and play together.  Having a deep sense of purpose and involvement with the people you love adds years to a lifespan. 

Lifestyle of Community

Those living in the Blue Zones have a real sense of belonging to their community.  They share a commitment to social network that they have built over a lifetime.  Most live in a village setting with people they grew up with and have known for years.  The concept of being lonely, which can take 8 years off average life expectancy, would be hard for them to understand.  In addition the bulk of the centenarians are involved in a faith based group of some kind. A deep religious faith and connection to other faith based people can add up to a decade in life expectancy.

Taking a lesson from lifestyles found in the Blue Zones and adapting them to our daily lives can be a challenge but is well worth the effort.  Aging cannot be helped but how you live as you age can make an amazing difference in the quantity and quality of the years you enjoy.

www.homeaidhealthcare.com

www.prairiehomeassistedliving.com

Kate McCarthy is Director of Operations for HomeAid Health Care which provides services for the elderly who wish to remain safe and independent at home.  HomeAid is sister company to Prairie Home Assisted Living which has served the physical, spiritual, mental and health needs of their residents since 1999.  Together the two companies provide comprehensive care for the elderly in the Fox Valley area of Wisconsin.

Sources:

“Here are the Secrets to a Long and Healthy Life” by Simon Worrall, National Geographic. April 12, 2015.

“The Blue Zones: Lessons for Living Longer from the People Who’ve Lived the Longest” by Dan Buettner.

National Geographic, 2009.

“Top Lifestyle Changes for Older Adults to Live a Longer, More Enjoyable Life” by Derek Jones, April 4, 2016.

The Costs of Aging in Place

Home Health Care allows

the elderly to age in place.

Image abandoning the place you’ve called home for the past 40 years, surrendering all your income and moving into a long-term care facility, a nursing home.  There you must share a room with a stranger, follow the facility’s schedule and spend the majority of your time alone or with nursing staff.  Of course this is a stereotype, many long term care facilities are lovely places, but this lonely scenario is what many older Americans fear to be waiting for them when they are too ill, injured or grow to frail to live independently. The majority of elderly are adamant that they do not want to end up in an institutional setting.  Today, with the rising costs of care, there is an increasing interest in home health care as an alternative to long term facilities.

Age in Place

Home Health Care provides health care and support services that can be received at home and is available for ill or disabled people of all ages.  The main goal of Home Health Care for the elderly and frail is to allow the individual to age in place.    Home Health services allow aging individuals to maintain their independence and remain comfortable in a familiar setting.  With Home Health Care, the aging can avoid moving to institutionalized long term care facilities.  Studies have shown that Home Health Care can actually improve the quality of care received and many times will reduce the need for hospitalization. 

Benefits of Home Health Care

With outcomes often as effective as care received in assisted living, rehabilitation and skilled nursing homes, Home Health Care brings a lot of benefits to those who use it.  Home Health Care providers get to really know their patients and families and can tailor their services to best meet the Client’s health care needs, finances and family preferences.  They can help families navigate the confusing web of health care resources and can effectively advocate the needs of their patients.  Another advantage is family is invited to become more involved and can participate in providing support and hands on care for their loved one.  In addition patient morale is often better at home and people tend to recover faster with less incidents and safety issues in a home setting.  Finally, there can be significant cost savings when using Home Health Care as there are no room and board costs compared to nursing home, rehabilitation centers and other institutional care settings.

Types of Home Health Care

There are two types of Home Health Care options available; Skilled Home Health Care and Non-Medical Home Health Care. 

Skilled Home Health Care is medical in nature and is used to provide skilled care or treatment or rehabilitation services to homebound patients.  This type of care is usually initiated by a physician and provided by a licensed medical professional such as an RN, LPN or Physical, Speech or Occupational Therapists.  Providers must follow specific federal guidelines and criteria regarding patient care.  Skilled Home Health Care providers are usually Medicare certified and can accept 3^rd party billing of health insurance which is great because out of pocket expenses range from $85 - $150/hour.

Non-Medical Home Health Care provided home services which are not considered to be skilled care but help the individual be safe and comfortable at home.  Services are usually initiated by social workers, family members or by the aging person in need.  Care is provided by trained Caregivers and CNAs (Certified Nursing Assistants).  Providers can be licensed by the state but requirements vary state to state.  Non-Medical Home Health is usually an out of pocket expense and ranges from $20 - $30/hour in cost.  Non-Medical Home Health Care can be covered by Medicare if coupled with Skilled Home Health Care.  Long term care insurance policies as well Veterans Aid and Assistance benefits can be used to pay these Non-Medical services.

How they work together

Let’s work through a scenario to see how Skilled and Non-Medical Home Health Care work together.  Margaret is an 83 year old female who was hospitalized due to a fall.  She was released after 3 days in the hospital.  Upon her discharge, the physicians and social workers agreed that Margaret could not be home alone during her recovery even though she was expected to make a full recovery in time.  Margaret elected to use Home Health Care rather than move into an assisted living or stay at a skilled rehabilitation center. 

Skilled Home Health Care was set up to monitor Margaret’s recovery and ensure she would not have to be readmitted to the hospital.  Weekly, 30 minute RN visits were scheduled to check her vitals, medications and general health.  Physical Therapists visited her at home biweekly to work with Margaret on her walking and balance skills to prevent future falls.  Non-Medical Home Health Care was set up to visit Margaret twice a day.  A 4 hour AM and a 2 hour PM shift came daily to help with companionship, medication reminders, assistance with exercise routines, transfers, showering, toileting and dressing as well as household chores and meals.  Within a month Margaret no longer needed the Skilled Home Health Care which was discontinued.  She retained the Non-Medical Home Health Care long term but reduced the hours to only 3 per day.  Margaret’s combined use of the services cost her very little compared to moving into a facility to recover.  The fact that she retained the Non-Medical Home Health Care means that she will be able to remain at home in the future even as her care needs increase. 

www.homeaidhealthcare.com

www.prairiehomeassistedliving.com

Kate McCarthy is Director of Operations for HomeAid Health Care which provides services for the elderly who wish to remain safe and independent at home.  HomeAid is sister company to Prairie Home Assisted Living which has served the physical, spiritual, mental and health needs of their residents since 1999.  Together the two companies provide comprehensive care for the elderly in the Fox Valley area of Wisconsin.

Hoarding Troubles

What looks like clutter to us, represents

 memories, travels, friends and love to seniors.

Charlie was a young boy during WWII and like many of his peers he remembers how it was to make do.  He tended to keep things just in case he might need them down the road.  Yet a lifetime of storing things became something far more than being frugal when his wife passed away.   After Marge’s  death the stuff accumulating around the house grew into more than just piles of clutter.  There were newspapers, old pill bottles, and empty food containers covering every flat surface, heaps of dirty laundry on the bed and floor and no clear path to move from room to room.  Clutter took over Charlie’s home and started to have a negative effect on many aspects of his life.

The hoarding of objects among the elderly is a serious problem.  Piles of hoarded objects can be a sign of a serious cognitive disorder and present a safety concern which requires immediate intervention.

Hoarding as a disorder

We all keep things.  For some, the item has sentimental value and for others it is about a possible need in the future, but often times the elderly keep things because they suffer from a cognitive disorder.  Diogenes Syndrome is a type of obsessive-compulsive disorder which is prevalent among the elderly.  It often presents itself in those suffering from dementia or frontal lobe impairment.  According to the American Geriatrics Society, Diogenes Syndrome is usually characterized by extreme self-neglect, household squalor, social withdrawal, apathy, compulsive hoarding of rubbish and a lack of shame.  This syndrome is usually found in people who lack social interaction and cognitive stimulation, have suffered a traumatic event or have a genetic predisposition to the condition. The elderly are prime candidates for hoarding prevalent in Diogenes syndrome. 

Those who suffer from elderly hoarding tend to use their possessions as a coping mechanism.  The onset of this condition can be triggered by an emotional trauma, like the death of a spouse.  The elderly person has a hard time dealing with their loss and so fixates on something they can control.  The disorder is also associated with those suffering from fear of loss, anxiety and depression.  In some cases hoarders just don’t know how to get rid of their unwanted possessions.  In other cases the collected items are kept out of sense of loyalty to the past or a compelling need to conserve.  No matter what is the underlying cause of hoarding, the accumulation of things over time combined with the daily bombardment of junk mail, bills, newspapers, dirty dishes and laundry can very easily become too overwhelming for the elderly to deal with. 

Risks of Hoarding

Having clutter around the house is risky for the elderly. Piles of newspaper and old books not only represent a potential fall risk but can add fuel to a fire.  Old clothes lying about on the floor invite damp, mold and mildew into the home.  Dirty dishes and expired food in the cupboard lure mice, rats and insects.  Piles of mail could hide important documents, unpaid bills or checks that need to go to the bank.

 

Hoarding not only creates anxiety, stress, guilt and embarrassment for the elderly but often destroys relationships with family members.  Adult children have a hard time trying to convince their elderly loved ones to allow them to sort through things and throw the junk away.  Relationships are strained and isolation becomes more of an issue when family stays away due to the unhygienic state of the home. 

What to watch for

Sometimes it is hard to recognize and label the problem as Diogenes syndrome.  Since confronting this issue can be difficult for family members, it is helpful to know what signs indicate a real problem. 

• Piles of clothes, newspapers, mail and unpaid bills
• Difficulty navigating safely through the house
• Frustration with sorting and organizing
• Difficulty managing activities of daily living
• Expired food in the refrigerator and cupboards
• Closets and drawer crammed with things
• Compulsive shopping
• Difficulty with discarding items
• Stroke or signs of dementia
• Loneliness

Helping an elderly loved one who is struggling with hoarding requires a lot of patience.  Bombarding the home with a ‘get this done today’ attitude or secretly clearing out things behind the hoarder’s back can only aggravate the stress in their lives.  It is important to remember that the house didn’t get this way because of poor housekeeping skills.  A hoarder is suffering from a disorder and needs emotional help before they are ready to toss anything. 

What to do to help

Experts suggest taking on small areas at a time.  Help an elderly loved one clear off a table and then praise the results.  Suggest donating items to a local charity or thrift shop.  Remind that safety in the home is important to being able to remain independent at home.  Work out an agreement of not keeping unused things for more than 6 months.  Clutter is about control and hoarders have a hard time letting things go, but allowing them to decide where things go can be very helpful.  Don’t think that once the house is clean, the problem has gone away.  Hoarders will continue keeping things and the place will slowly fill up again unless the underlying emotional issues are dealt with and there is practical help in keeping the clutter at bay.

www.homeaidhealthcare.com

www.prairiehomeassistedliving.com

Kate McCarthy is Director of Operations for HomeAid Health Care which provides services for the elderly who wish to remain safe and independent at home.  HomeAid is sister company to Prairie Home Assisted Living which has served the physical, spiritual, mental and health needs of their residents since 1999.  Together the two companies provide comprehensive care for the elderly in the Fox Valley area of Wisconsin.

Vulnerable Seniors - Substance abuse among the Elderly

The most common forms of elderly addiction are

alcoholism and painkiller dependency.

It's not something you often hear about, but the elderly of America are increasingly at risk of becoming addicts [1]. Our notion of seniors doesn't tend to fit with our viewpoint of addicts - I'm willing to bet that you raised an eyebrow at the first sentence - but the problem exists nonetheless, and is growing. The most common forms of addiction are alcoholism and painkiller dependency - both of which can be just as devastating for seniors as younger people.  

Stereotypes

Stereotypes can be a major obstacle in all areas of drug rehabilitation [2], but it's particularly relevant when it comes to seniors. Typically seniors aren’t what is pictured when we think about addicts. In fact, if asked to describe the stereotypical antithesis of an addict, a nice old lady is probably what you'd come up with. This kind of attitude frequently leads people to miss the warning signs of a growing substance dependency.  It may even lead them to unwittingly encourage substance-abusing behaviors.

"Oh go on, Granny, have another glass of wine!"   Well meaning people often encourage addictive behavior with the belief that they are not likely to be adding to an existing problem or it can’t do their elderly loved one any real harm anyway. There is also a prevailing belief that seniors should be allowed to indulge their taste for alcohol, or pop an extra pain pill if they want to. The general attitude is that the elderly are old enough to have 'earned it’.   There is also the misconception that the elderly are too old for an addiction to really damage to their lives.

For seniors themselves, there is an attitude that they don't have to worry too much about their bodies any longer, so indulging a bit really won’t hurt them.  Relying on a former self-image of living a sober lifestyle may cause some Elderly to miss the signs that an addiction has taken hold.  The belief that they are not the kind of people who abuse substances makes it all the easier to 'let themselves go'[3].  

Loneliness and Boredom

As we age, many of us may find ourselves more isolated than we used to be. Too many seniors find themselves living excruciatingly lonely lives.  Loneliness is incredibly bad for anyone's mental health, but it can be especially damaging to an older person who may need human stimulation to keep their mental faculties active. Coupled with grief, which often affects seniors as they lose friends and loved ones, the recipe for a slide into depression-related addiction is a potent one. Loneliness has been proven to have a strong association with alcoholism in many studies [4] - particularly when, as is often the case with retirees who live alone, it is coupled with an excess of free time and boredom. Grief and depression may also trigger comfort drinking, or encourage a growing reliance upon the emotional numbing effects of opioid painkillers.

Opportunity

Older people are a lot more likely to be on medication than younger people, which unfortunately gives them a lot more opportunity to become addicted to prescription drugs. Prescription drug addiction is an enormous problem within the United States, taking more lives on an annual basis than heroin and cocaine combined. Many of the painkillers prescribed to our seniors are opioids, just like heroin, or benzodiazepines, which affect the central nervous system. They're powerfully addictive, and a vast swathe of our population is currently in the grip of prescription drug dependency, to which many lose their lives [5].

Most addicts stumble accidentally into addiction, assuming that pills given to them by a doctor can't be bad.  The often get hooked by upping their doses by increments in order to help them 'get by' on 'bad days'. In the case of seniors with cognitive impairment, a dependency can be developed by forgetting having taken the medication and accidentally repeating dosages. Alternatively, even non-addictive prescription medication can interact poorly with alcohol, thus contributing to other dependency issues. And the fact that the symptoms of addiction often mimic symptoms which we generally associate with old age [6] and its related illnesses means that often these addictions are not recognized until it is too late.

What Can We Do?

So how can we help our ageing loved ones to steer clear of the addiction trap? If you have concerns about an elderly loved one's inclination towards addictive substances, keeping an eye on worrying behaviors is the best way to confirm any suspicions. One excellent way to help is to remove the burden of loneliness, boredom, and grief by providing emotional support, visiting regularly, and providing them with plenty of human stimulation.  Keeping an eye on drinking habits and any medicines they're taking is also a good idea. Taking an interest in their health and emotional state can work wonders in preventing a problem from developing!

A home health Caregiver can also be an enormous boon in this situation. Not only will a medically trained Caregiver keep track of what your loved one is taking and when, they'll also be on hand to pick up on any worrying symptoms and trends within their lives.

Addictions can ruin a person's golden years - but good health, both physical and mental, will make the elder years a time of joy.

www.homeaidhealthcare.com

www.prairiehomeassistedliving.com

Mel Higham is a writer and editor with a special interest in mental health and wellness.  As a guest writer for HomeAid Health Care’s Elder Topics, Mel brings her expertise to our audience.

HomeAid is sister company to Prairie Home Assisted Living which has served the physical, spiritual, mental and health needs of their residents since 1999. Together the two companies provide comprehensive care for the elderly in the Fox Valley area of Wisconsin

[1] American Osteopathic Association, "Substance Abuse in Senior Citizens - A Serious Problem"

[2] Bruno Gnaneswaran, "Shattering Society's Stereotypes Of Drug Users", Concrete, Jan 2013

[3] Rita Milios, "Seniors and Substance Abuse: The Invisible Epidemic", Recovery.org, Sept 2015

[4] Igemar Akerland, Jan Olof Hornquist, "Loneliness and alcohol abuse: A review of evidences of an interplay", Journal of Social Sciences and Medicine, Feb 1992

[5] Centers For Disease Control And Prevention, "Injury Prevention And Control: Prescription Drug Overdose"

[6] Medical News Today, "All About Addiction"

Home Health Care

Most elderly want to stay at home

but are confused about

how Home Health Care can help.

Peter and Mary have lived in their home for over 40 years.  They have loved and cared for the house, the garden and the 4 children they raised there.  Now as they are aging and the children have grown and gone, they find it increasingly difficult to keep up the place.  Basic yard work and housekeeping isn’t being done and daily household chores like cooking and laundry are becoming a bit overwhelming.  Yet despite Peter’s troubles with walking and managing showers and Mary’s failing eyesight, they want to stay at home rather than move into an assisted living facility. They decided to get a Home Health Caregiver who will come and help them out a couple time a week.    

Most elderly and disabled prefer to stay at home and are choosing to use Home Health Care services to make that possible. Home Health Care is a practical and efficient way for individuals with health care or age related issues to get the services they need right in the convenience of their own home. 

There are two types of Home Health Care options, which can be confusing when someone is just starting to look into Home Health as a possible solution to their care needs.

Skilled (Medical) Home Health Care

Skilled or Medical Home Health Care is generally used to help someone get healthy at home. Skilled Home Health is usually recommended after a doctor’s visit or a hospital stay and the care is provided by medical professionals, such as a visiting RN or LPN.  Because the level of care being provided is skilled, the costs can be high.  Skilled Home Health Care is usually limited to just a few hours a week and assists with very specific needs.

With Skilled Home Health Care you can expect:

•   Skilled nursing
•  At-home physical therapy
•  Pain Management
• Caring for wounds
• Prescription management

Non-Medical Home Health Care

Non-Medical Home Health Care is about sustaining and maintaining a quality of life at home.  It is about preserving safety and independence at home for someone who might not be able to remain safe and independent on their own.  Many times the Caregivers who provide these services are Certified Nursing Assistants (CNA).  These services are a lot less expensive than the Skilled Home Health and can be used on a wider scale.  Often those who use Skilled Home Health Care will also have Non-Medical Home Health Care come to help with various tasks to keep the home running smoothly.

With Non-Medical Home Health Care you can expect:

•  Personal grooming services like bathing or assistance getting dressed
•  Ambulation services like assistance getting in and out of the bed/shower
• Medication reminders
• Alzheimer's or Dementia care
• Errands like grocery shopping, picking up prescriptions or transportation to appointments
• Housekeeping, laundry and cooking
• Companionship

Home Health Care Costs

Because both Medical and Non-Medical Home Health can get expensive, people wonder what payment options are available to help with the costs.  The cost of services will vary depending on where you live and the type of services needed.  It is a good idea to shop around and learn what services are provided.  Some Home Health Care agencies have sliding fee scales, and others charge on a per task basis and others provide a Caregiver who can assist with all cares needed at set hourly rate. Non-Medical Home Health Care services are usually paid for privately, but there are also some public and private funding sources.  Funding sources include the following:

•  Medicare
• Medicaid
• The Older Americans Act
• The Veterans’ Administration
• Private insurance

Home Health Care (Skilled or Non-Medical) is a great way to get the assistance needed without having to give up the family home and move into a facility.  As more and more people understand the options available with Home Health Care, it is bound to become a favorite option for families everywhere.

www.homeaidhealthcare.com

www.prairiehomeassistedliving.com

Kate McCarthy is Director of Operations for HomeAid Health Care which provides services for the elderly who wish to remain safe and independent at home.  HomeAid is sister company to Prairie Home Assisted Living which has served the physical, spiritual, mental and health needs of their residents since 1999. Together the two companies provide comprehensive care for the elderly in the Fox Valley area of Wisconsin.

Aging & Staying Positive

A positive attitude about aging plays 

an active role in health.

Life expectancy is increasing in the USA and other wealthy countries, yet as the population ages they are faced with very real prejudice.  Ageism against the elderly population manifests itself throughout the American culture.  From fighting against the “old geezer” stereotype, to the assumption of cognitive or physical impairment, to being the butt of the old timer jokes, today’s elderly constantly battle against Ageism.  In fact nearly 80% of the elderly population report experiencing Ageism. Despite the fact ageism is now recognized a problem in society, it is not decreasing at a fast enough rate.  American culture focuses and idolized youth. Negative stereotypes about the elderly often develop from of fear of the unknown and are established at a young age in a person’s mindset.  This fear of the aging process creates Ageism and is often expressed by the assumption that:

• Elders are slow when they move about.
• Elders are in ill health.
• Elders cannot learn new things.
• Elders are depressed and complain all the time about change.

The stereotype assumes that the elderly are needy, feeble, idle and demanding rather than deserving, yet in reality the majority of elderly today are self-sufficient, middle-class consumers with resources, talent and time to contribute to society. Unfortunately Ageism not only affects how society treats the elderly but also how the elderly perceive themselves.

Reliable research on today’s aging population shows an increased quality of life while aging. This research supports the idea that stereotypes held by people have a direct link to their health and well-being.  For example, Yale University found that older people who hold negative stereotypes about themselves getting older are more likely to display negative response to stress, self-efficacy, cognitive function, and are more likely to have a negative view of their own peers. Not only was it found that negative stereotypes affect performance and attitudes, it was also found that these beliefs contributed to the elderly’s will to live with healthy development.

These stereotypes may hold some value to the people who are suffering with later stages of an incurable diagnosis. Those with health issues who are active and hold a positive outlook on reaching developmental milestones throughout their entire life are not affected by negative stereotypes and do better physically and emotionally. The good news is that holding positive views of ageing has a real beneficial impact on people.  Keeping a positive attitude compared to a negative attitude on aging has been associated with a 44% greater likelihood of recovery from severe disability.

Holding a negative thought about aging is self discriminating.

“If you are a man you are prejudiced against women you will never know how a woman feels. If you are white and you are prejudiced against blacks, you will never know how a black person feels. But if you are young and you are prejudiced against the old, you are indeed prejudiced against yourself, because you, too, will have the honor of being old someday” (Lewis, C 1989)

Changing negative stereotypes is difficult because people hold predetermined social images reinforcing these stereotypes, and thus are resistant to change. Environmental and social impact of being comfortable with aging allows for a positive impact on healthy life choices for all generations.  

www.homeaidhealthcare.com

www.prairiehomeassistedliving.com

Sources:

Journal of the American Medical Association

 Levy BR, et al "Association between positive age stereotypes and recovery from disability in older persons" JAMA 2012; 308: 1972-1973.

Lewis, C. 1989. How the myths of aging impact rehabilitive care for the older person. Occupational Therapy Forum

Susan Sherriff, CNA and Marketing student, is a contributing writer to Elder Topics as part of a Marketing Internship.  As a member of the HomeAid Health Care team, Susan uses over 10 years of Caregiver experience to assist our elderly and disabled Clients who wish to remain safe and independent at home.  HomeAid is a sister company to Prairie Home Assisted Living which has served the physical, spiritual, mental and health needs of their Residents since 1999.  Together the two companies provide comprehensive care that meets the needs of the elderly and disabled in the Fox Valley of Wisconsin.

What you need to know when you are the family Caregiver

Knowing what to expect can make it easier.

Providing care for an elderly loved one feels like the right thing to do.  Often family members grow into the role of Caregiver as their aging parents need more and more help.  A bit of yard work in the fall, help with spring cleaning, driving to doctor appointments and weekly trips to the supermarket are easy to accommodate and most families are happy to have the opportunity to help.   It is when the need for help becomes daily or reaches a point when your elderly loved one isn’t safe living on their own any longer, that families need to make some hard decisions.  Families will often slide into becoming their loved one’s full time Caregiver and then they find themselves providing care for their own young family and their aging parents. 

The Sandwich Generation

A term coined by Carol Abaya in the early 1990’s, the Sandwich Generation describes those in their 50s or 60s who are sandwiched providing care for their aging parents and their adult children and grandchildren. It is a challenging time period for these people as they have demands on their energy and resources from everyone in their family.  Many start out enthusiastic and excited about being able to give back to the one who had raised them, only to become burned out and bitterly disappointed at how their relationships, quality of life and energy levels have been destroyed.

For those who decide to take on the many responsibilities and demands of becoming the Caregiver for their aging loved ones, there are some basic tips which might make providing care easier

Know that you will have to make hard choices

Many don’t realize when they start out as family Caregivers that they are now have taken on the responsibility to make another person’s decisions.  Many times this makes the Caregiver the least favorite person in the family.  Having to decide on an endless list of health care issues, finances and quality of life decisions can be exhausting, but it is often compounded by your loved one not agreeing with what you think is best.  Siblings often add their 2 cents, making basic decisions a multi-leveled negotiation. Many elderly will resist getting input into major decisions believing their independence is being infringed on.  Often they are slow to consider the options and will put making any type of choice permanently on hold.  It is frustrating for those who provide care to be patient and respectful especially when deadlines are looming.

It is wise to have major decisions already determined before they become an issue.  Sit down with your aging loved one and discuss how they want their affairs handled long before they can no longer manage themselves.  Your loved ones can set up directives early which will take the pressure off of you to decide for them later in life.  Life is much easier when medical directives are in place, the will has been made, Power of Attorney for finances and health are set up and end-of-life choices have been decided.

Know that caring for an elderly parent is not like caring for a child

Remember that your aging loved one has lived an entire life before you even came into existence, so treating them as if they were another child is disrespectful and demeaning.  Expect there will be times when their behavior is as stubborn as a toddler’s, but do not respond as you would to a child.  Instead try to find out what is going on and give them the time to discuss their concerns and fears.  Do not expect your loved one to easily adapt to your schedule and ways of doing things.  They are probably pretty set in their ways and have every right to be so.  Also remember that they crave adult interaction and need to be included in your family’s normal life and activities, even if doing so requires a lot of extra effort on your part.  The last thing you want is to have them feel as if their presence is a burden and that they are isolated and lonely and just taking up space in your home.

Know that providing care can be uncomfortably embarrassing

Understand that as your loved ones continue to age, their need for assistance with personal care will increase.  This can cause embarrassment for both generations.  Helping with showering, dressing and toileting can be weird for the adult children of aging parents, but after a few times it will feel less awkward.  Trouble with incontinence and loss of body functions can make everyone cringe and for some it is just easier on relationships to have a professional Caregiver come in a couple times a week to help with personal cares.

Know that providing care will affect your other relationships

Being a Caregiver is a very demanding job.  It requires a servant’s heart at all times and usually without any recognition or thanks.  Most often it is the women in the family who take on this role in addition to all their other duties and responsibilities.  Being stretched to the limit, the family Caregiver will find relationships on all sides bearing the brunt of frustrations, exhaustion and weariness. Interaction between the aging parents and adult children can become strained, as well relationships with everyone else in the family.  People often imagine having multiple generations under the same roof will be wonderful, especially for the younger children.  They fail to realize that the aging have limited tolerance for noise and commotion and would prefer some space from the younger members of the family. 

Know that doctors are interested in prolonging life, not the quality of life

Doctors will be a primary source of information and help as your loved one’s health needs increase.  They are kind, caring and committed to your loved one’s well being, but their main concern is dealing with the physical concerns that prolong life.   This most likely will result in more and more prescriptions for medications, endless office visits and lots of tests.  As the family Caregiver, your job will be to facilitate the doctor orders, to manage the medications and interface between physicians.   It will fall on you to become your loved one’s advocate for health care concerns.  Yet your primary concern should be about making the final years and months comfortable and enjoyable.  Most elderly are far more concerned about quality of life over longevity and if often falls on the family Caregiver to ensure the quality of life through social interaction, conversation, easy projects and just being there to listen. 

Know that you will need help

Being a family Caregiver can be difficult and stressful, especially when providing care for an aging loved one is sandwiched in with all the other demands of life.  While in the midst of providing care, life can get so busy that it is difficult to see the toll that it takes on your energy, relationships and family.  Most families eventually realize that they need help.  Finding a professional Caregiver to come into the home a couple times a week makes an enormous difference.  Respite Care is another option that allows family Caregiver to get away and unwind. 

Families often naively believe that they can provide care for their aging loved ones with minimal stress or stain on their lives.  Since the end goal is enjoying a close and loving relationship with their aging loved ones, knowing what to expect can make it easier to avoid stressful problems for the entire family. 

www.homeaidhealthcare.com

www.prairiehomeassistedliving.com

Kate McCarthy is Director of Operations for HomeAid Health Care which provides services for the elderly who wish to remain safe and independent at home.  HomeAid is sister company to Prairie Home Assisted Living which has served the physical, spiritual, mental and health needs of their residents since 1999.  Together the two companies provide comprehensive care for the elderly in the Fox Valley area of Wisconsin.